


How It All Started

by demonfox1994



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: F/F, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Game(s), Somewhat OC Some what character mentioned in game, how the railroad started, minor character deaths mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-16 19:53:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5838838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonfox1994/pseuds/demonfox1994
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the Railroad’s putting an end to the Institute, Desdemona finds her with time to think about how she ended up where she is and who she lost along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How It All Started

**Author's Note:**

> This little dabble was based off of Desdemona's death line. for those who don't know if desdemona is killed for whatever reason she will say "Sam... I'm coming home.." this was my take on who Sam was

Desdemona sighed to herself as she shifted the papers and maps sprawled across her makeshift table before standing up. It was nights like these that caused her mind to wonder. The Institute was dealt with. Sure they still had the occasional Gen One and Gen Two that would attack and the remainder of the Brotherhood was rather annoying, but over all they were safe. Her people could sleep at night again and continue their work to get the Synths that they had been able to save out of the Commonwealth

But right now that wasn’t what was on her mind. She looked around HQ and sighed again as she pulled a cigarette from her vest and make her way out to the old church, not wanting to wake anyone with her shuffling around.

It was rare that Desdemona would leave the underground but sometimes she would come up for air, normally during the cover of night, and nights like these were happening more and more. Nights where her mind would wander away from work and just remember now she ended up in this mess anyway.

Sam... her same ‘How many years has it been?’ she found herself thinking as she sat down on the stairs to the old church and looked up at the night sky, stars still shimmering. It had been a night like this she met her, Sam was probably out of the Institute a week,still wearing that bright jumper that they all wore. She could have been caught shining like a bacon if it hadn’t been for her.

Des didn’t know what made her take her in and help. She barely knew what Synths were at the time... “ Her eyes…” Des sighed that was it. Sam had the most beautiful blue eyes. Something about the way her dark hair hung around her face. That was an image that still hadn’t faded from Des’s mind. She took a long drag off of her cigarette and shook her head

Whatever the reason, she took her in, got her a change of clothes and hid her. She had never expected that this is where she would be after. S8-33 was her name for the Institute...  it took her a week to pick Sam, but Des always felt that was the perfect name for her. At first it was just the two of them that’s all it had meant to be over in Goodneighbor “God... if she could see me now...” She sighed remembering how everything had played out.

This was before the Railroad, before Dr. Amari’s mind wipes, before the face changes it was just Sam and her until the Coursers started to come Des would help to keep them at bay, even if it did start the spark or worry for Goodneighbor. She didn’t care, she had Sam. She caused a softness in the strong women. When Sam was around Desdemona felt she could just let her emotions go, and her guard down.

By now her cig was at it’s end . She dropped it too the ground to stomp it out before groaning. Who was next? Dr. Amari... or Glory… Dr. Amari because of the day, Sam took a stray bullet... Irma and Amari had been good friends of her and willing to help, basically from that day the Railroad was born.  It had started with them just trying to keep Sam safe and help her blend in as well as she could with humans. Des nodded remembering the Glory came after the Doctor because Amari had found her she had somehow made it to Goodneighbor on her own.. Des knew the girl was a fighter, so they started to help Glory out too. Sam had showed her that Synths where just looking for a second chance, and Des knew about that all too well.

The others came along on their own but for the most part it was same and her just trying to right a wrong in this fucked up world.  Still didn’t remember where Tinker Tom came from he just sort of appeared one day once they came to the switchboard.  Pam was saved from some Gunners trying to reset her programing to make her a killing machine. So why not give another robot a second chance?

Des shook her head trying to shake the memories from her mind. The more she thought about how everyone started to come together the more everything started to hurt. How many people had they lost in the past year? The switchboard, Glory.. plus all the others from before. “Sam.. I miss you love...” she sighed wiping away a stray tear she would never let the others see. She was their leader.  Strong, years of experience, and yet here she was crying. When everything was going right.

She knew she had a right to cry. She had lost something in this war, her whole reason for starting the Railroad. There were no more night walks with her, no more arms wrapping around her waist while she was trying to work. The whispers in her ear to get some rest had long since quieted and the emptiness was still there. The ones who had been there from the beginning knew the effect. Desdemona rarely smiled. Only when they were coming closer and closer to their goal had the smile returned only for quick moments. “All of this was for you... And you're not even here to celebrate... how fucked up is that...” She sighed lifting another cigarette and taking a long drag.

She missed these nights with her. They would come out and just stare up at the stars. Sam would laugh and say that the stars would make shapes. Desdemona would just roll her eyes, but Sam wouldn’t stop until she found one the other women would notice. But now alone Des looked up. “ I see it... The two mole rats...” she laughed lightly. Letting her wall down as the tears started to well.

And now her last memory replayed in her mind over and over again. That damn Courser… they had been returning from Bunker Hill when he hit. Even now most of it is a blur of gunshots.  She just remembered grabbing Sam and running, not thinking just trying to keep them moving until they had lost him.  Somehow they made it back to the switchboard but when they stopped Sam cringed in pain before falling over. She had been hit far too many times with that damn energy weapon; she had done it to save her.

“Sam I... I can’t lose you not yet maybe Tinker or…” before she could finish her felt her lover’s lips struggle up to reach her own, soft but cold on her own. “It's my time Des…” she rasped... “Keep them safe for me love…”  she said softly “I’ll... see you at home…”

By now Des had lost it. Her had her head in her hands and were crying out on that step. She should be happy. They had done what she had dreamed of,but without Sam... it was bitter sweet. “Sam…” She whimpered out not hearing the sound of the door behind her as another figure sat down next to her. Des’s face still pressed into her hands as she felt and arm land around her shoulder

Des looked up a bit. In the moonlight, with her eyes soaked she could have sworn she saw Dam . When she finally managed to wipe away the tears she saw it was just Charmer. Strange that the other women had the same bright blue eyes as Sam. “Shouldn’t you be..” She started voice weak. “ Asleep, Out of your hair, Annoying PAM? Possibly yes to all three... but I heard you slip out... and you have been out here for a while so... I thought I should check up...” Chamer moved her arm so she was rubbing Des’s back.” I guess this Sam was important”

“Only the whole damn reason the Railroad is here.” She mumbled still trying to wipe away the tears. They had lost so many. They had been doing so good yet... Sam was still there stuck in her mind. That damn goofy smile of hers.

Charmer nodded “I was a mess.. After what happened to Nate...I know these wounds don’t heal easy...”

“Says the woman who’s married to the news girl.” Des retorted

“Hey just because I have been able to move on... Doesn’t mean everyone can.  I had a lot of people help me though my pain. It seems like you... Might not have let yourself grieve her... Being the leader of all this... All I’m saying is,it's okay to take a moment Desdemona... You don’t need to be strong all the time. You’re allowed to miss them.”

“ Her... Sam... Was a her.” she took a breath. “She had bright blue eyes... Dark hair...” she bit her lip .“And used to tell me I was too serious...and would try find shapes in the stars... She said that those were two mole rats… that was a baby deathclaw…” she voiced seemed soft. “And that... Is where she said she saw me... Out there with all the beauty in the sky as she would say… “You don’t get to see that kind of stuff in the Institute... And I have you to thank for that.” Desdemona quoted just remembering how Sam used to look at her kind of a bit like a love sick puppy. “...God do I miss her...” Desdemona took another moment just staring up at the stars with Charmer lightly rubbing her back. Soon she would stand up,wipe away the last of her tears and go back to work.  Charmer following behind her after taking a moment to look up at the sky. There were still synths that needed to leave the Commonwealth, the Railroad still needed its leader to run it.

**Author's Note:**

> So that was pretty much my take on what caused the railroad to start , and take on who same might have been, so some what of an OC on my part. hope you guys enjoyed it, I feel that the minor charaecters never get enough love, and Desdemona was someone I really liked right from when she is introduced.


End file.
